3 Questions to Ask If You're Considering Using Donor Sperm

Dec 11, 2023
3 Questions to Ask If You're Considering Using Donor Sperm
Deciding to use donor sperm to grow your family is a personal decision. However, before you go to the sperm bank or ask your best male friend to serve as your donor, you need to ask yourself a few questions first.

Advancements in infertility treatments have opened the parenthood door for many people, including those without healthy sperm or a male partner to fertilize an egg.  If you find yourself contemplating the use of sperm donation to help build your family, you have some questions you need to consider first.

At CARE Fertility in Bedford and Fort Worth, Texas, our reproductive endocrinology and infertility specialists offer many options for people struggling with infertility. Though we don’t have a sperm bank, we do use donor sperm when appropriate.

In this month’s blog, we share with you three important questions you need to ask yourself when considering the use of donor sperm to add to your family.

1. Do I want to know the donor?

It’s not unusual for people to have a sperm donor already in mind when they need sperm to fertilize an egg. 

You may select a male donor from your partner’s family so your child has a biological connection to them. Or you may have a close friend who has the qualities you want in your child and is willing to donate sperm to help you grow your family.

However, you don’t need to know your sperm donor. Sometimes, not knowing the donor can make the process a little easier, eliminating some of the emotional and legal drama that can come with accepting a donation from a friend or family member.

Sperm banks have a wide selection of donors who’ve been pre-screened and tested. If you don’t have a sperm donor or don’t want to use someone you know, an anonymous donor from a sperm bank makes a great choice. 

Do you want to know the donor? The answer to this question is important and helps with decision-making. 

2. Do I want my child to know the donor?

When deciding on your sperm donor, you need to consider what type of relationship you want your child and sperm donor to have. Do you want your child to know the donor? Would you rather your donor remain anonymous?

If you choose a friend or family member, you need to talk to them about what type of relationship they want to have with your child so you’re all on the same page. Do they want to be known as the biological father with regular visits? Do they want to be in the child’s life but not as a father figure?

You may have more control over whether your child knows the donor or not when using an anonymous donor from a sperm bank. Male donors may sign a waiver specifically stating whether they want the child to learn their identity. 

3. What traits are important to you?

You also have to consider what traits you want a donor to have, including:

  • Physical characteristics such as height, eye color, and skin color
  • Personality traits like interests and hobbies and reason for donating
  • Education level
  • Health history

Our donor sperm comes from accredited sperm banks who thoroughly screen and test all donors. The sperm is tested for diseases at the time of collection and again several weeks later to ensure it’s safe to use. 

Even if you choose a friend or family member as a sperm donor, we recommend utilizing a sperm bank to collect and test the sperm before moving ahead with infertility treatments. 

Donor sperm makes pregnancy possible for single women, lesbian couples, and couples with an infertile male partner. 

Are you considering donor sperm? We can talk to you about your infertility options and answer all of your questions. Call or request an appointment online at the CARE Fertility office nearest you today.